DAMNIT

I hate feeling like this! I don't know, I'm so antsy and anxious. I feel like I keep messing up, over and over. I want to do the right thing, I'm trying really hard. I just don't get it. Maybe I'm trying too hard, but I don't know. When I find something good, I don't want to let go. AT ALL. Maybe I'm just over thinking everything, but I have no idea. I don't think it's what I think it is (that sentance doesn't make sense at all). I just have a problem with over analyzing everything, I have the worst gut feeling in the world right now. I just need to calm down a little bit.

Christ...

So, I'm fallen completely head over heels for this girl. She brings out a side of me that I haven't seen in a really long time, and I like it. I'm experiencing feelings that I thought were locked and never going to be seen again, but I'm scared. I'm terrified because what if... What if it isn't that I think it is? What if it's just another lost cause and I'm stuck on a desolte road alone... again. I'm just trying to keep my head straight and not screw up too much, and hope that things develope even more. I'm starting to adore her more each day, I must sound like a creep to her. I hope I don't come off as that, because it would be the last thing I would want. I'm just gonna take a day at a time, and enjoy the time we spend together.